ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I will be naked everywhere
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize