Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
