I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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