what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
