At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
