I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
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