i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
it's like heaven, but drunker
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Randomize
