For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
