Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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