i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize