.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
NoShamevember. You game?
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
My life is pants optional.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
