Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
