I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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