I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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