yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
