Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize