Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
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