So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
