when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Randomize
