yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
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