ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
