I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
