I'm pants shitting drunk right now
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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