I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Can I color on your dick again?
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
not ubering you a puppy
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
