dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
