Pappa wants mamma naked
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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