so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
