It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
