I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
