that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished�
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
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