my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
