make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Randomize
