Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Randomize
