Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Randomize
