I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
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