this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
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