Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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