We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
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