what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
