i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
