Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Randomize
