Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
