Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I just want nice things and good sex
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Randomize
