Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
