Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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