dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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