do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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