i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize
