I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
When did angry sex become our thing?
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
