I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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